Autumn, also known as fall in North American English, is one of the four temperate seasons. Autumn marks the transition from summer to winter, in September or March, when the duration of daylight becomes noticeably shorter, the temperature cools considerably, your skin becomes dry and cracked and you start thinking, is this all that life has to offer me?
Musing #9
THIS POST WAS DELETED BECAUSE IT WAS TOO BORING!
Musing #8
The way people are talking about white lady juice on the internet, you’d think it was the elixir of life. Or at least, you’d think it was more than just the liquidized form of a white lady whose greatest contribution to society prior to this wellness trend was providing a vehicle for peanut butter and raisins to children at snack time.
Musing #7
What color are your pubes?
Musing #6
If you wanna sound fun, talk in a southern accent.
If you wanna look fun, rock your booty from side to side when you walk.
If you wanna smell fun, spray yourself with Poo Pourri. *
*As an important aside, I am an investor in this brand, which is just further proof that I rly like it.
Musing #5
When you’re young you look so young. Then you get older and start to look like a turtle. Especially up close.
Musing #4
When it comes to eyes, how close is too close?
Musing #3
Are you talking to meme?
Musing #2.5
Are some animals more curious than others?
Musing #2
Welcome to the middle of 2018. Remember when I had that photo-retouching job and I sat in a dark room all day? That wasn't good for me. Now I sit in a sunny room, overlooking a bridge and a river and trying to think of a novelty event that will put me on the map. Here are some ideas:
-parallel parking contest
-frog jumping contest (gotta be careful, don't want to upset the animal rights activists)
-nearly-rotten food contest where you have nearly rotten food to cook with
Here's the thing, will it be as successful as my pig-petting contest.
Doubt it.
Musing #1
Imagine we sang all the time?
Imagine you could mold your features like Silly Putty.
Imagine my name wasn't Ima Weiner. (It's not.)
Welcome to this new movie. It stars Scarlett Johansson. There is no talking. Only shots of lips and butts. Ebert gave it two thumbs up. "The New York Times" says it's "highly feminist." Richard Brody of "The New Yorker" says "it is a totally different movie than the movie they set out to make and somehow strangely intoxicating." Plus Richard Brody says "I love butts." Chris Pratt says "boing." And he has the final word.